


Last Attempt (Being Rewritten At Some Point)

by AlizarinTheNotsoGreat



Category: Eddsworld - All Media Types
Genre: Heavy Angst, Hurt/Comfort, I say Pat and Pau, M/M, Pat and Pau are Tords overprotective gay parents okay, So is Tom, Tord Redemption, Tord is finally realizing what a douche he is, Tord is self-destructive, dont worry, help pls, its also not rated because i didnt know what to rate it, lots o' angst and tears oops, sorta - Freeform, theres also humor fitted in there as well, this is my first fic how do I tag
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2017-09-04
Updated: 2017-09-11
Packaged: 2018-12-23 14:39:21
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 3,786
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/11991828
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/AlizarinTheNotsoGreat/pseuds/AlizarinTheNotsoGreat
Summary: It's been months since The Incident, and the consequences of what Tord had done was eating him from the inside. So, in a last attempt to save himself and his army, he goes to apologize. But he certainly didn't expect this of all things to happen.





	1. Realization

**Author's Note:**

> as ive said, this is my first fic, and im pretty nervous about posting it  
> i hope you enjoy 'n all that good stuff

" _But I thought we were... I thought we were friends!_ " 

Tord sighed, lighting the cigar he held. He put it to his mouth, inhaling and slowly blowing all the smoke out, watching the wind carry it away. He looked down at the houses and scattered people, thinking they looked like ants from up there. 

 " ** _This_** _is for the house. **This** is for my friends.  **And this** is for  **my face**!_ " 

_Here.._

He was on the cliff, where his robot crashed. The view was absolutely gorgeous in the morning, but Tord couldn't bring himself to care. It was torture sitting on the cliff, being able to see the damage he caused. But it was the only place he could be alone. Sure, he had his own room in the base, but sometimes he wanted a breath of fresh air away from the dark halls, the work, his soldiers. 

Like right now. 

" _I. Am not! Your! **Friend**!" _

Tord brought the cigar to his lips, taking longer breaths,  _holding_ longer breaths. He gave everything a blank stare as he began to speak, "It's been a full month by now, Tord." He chuckled dryly. 

"A full month and you're still not over that stupid 'incident'." 

He stood up, appreciating the way the wind blew on his face. He looked at the cigar for just a moment, before spinning on his heel and walking away.  _I'll finish it on the way_. He thought. 

 

* * *

 

 

Tord hadn't realized how long he'd been working until Pat came in, his expression showing worry and disappointment. 

 "Tord, you can't sit here and work every second of the day like this." He scolded, crossing his arms. Tord only rolled his eyes at the other's comment. "Hey, maybe if I sit here long enough I can die of dehydration." He said, his eyebrows furrowed in annoyance. The two stared at each other for a moment. 

 "Tord that wasn't funny." "It wasn't supposed to be," Tord said with a smirk that did not meet his tired eyes. 

 Pat looked as if he was going to continue speaking before Tord cut him off, speaking once more. "Well, I have those energy bars you thought you could sneak into my drawer without me noticing," At that, Pat flushed at having been caught, "So I am fine. Now, if you'll excuse me, I have work that needs to be done." He said no more, and continued working.

Pat stayed for a beat longer, before leaving Tord in the darkness of his office. 

After at least an hour of non-stop work, Tord decided that maybe death by dehydration and starvation was a little  _too_ painful for his liking and opened up the drawer where they were kept. He stopped dead in his tracks.

There was a picture of Edd, Matt, Tom, and him. They all looked so happy, even Tom... Another picture caught his eye. He placed the one he held on the desk, and picked the other up. These were taken on his birthday. It was multiple photos, the kind of strip you'd get from a photo booth, or Chuck E. Cheese. 

The first held him and Edd. Smiling, as if there was nothing bad in the world. The next, was him and Matt. Matt's smile was much bigger than Tord's. In fact, Tord looked pretty embarrassed with Matt pretty much embracing him. The next was Tom, Edd, and him. Tord smiled sadly, remembering what happened. Tom had outright refused to be alone with Tord for just one picture. He woud only do it if someone else was in there. 

The last one made him freeze. 

It wasn't any different from the picture on the desk. They were all squeezed tight together, and he's pretty sure him and Tom had to sit on Matt and Edd's laps to take the picture. They all made silly faces.. Except for Tom. He gave the camera a blank stare. A normal occurrence. 

Tord blinked when he noticed the wet spots dripping onto the picture. His hand flew to his cheek, and sure enough he was crying. "For fucks sake.." He mumbled, wiping his eyes. He sighed heavily, setting the picture down on the desk, on the other one. He laid his head in his hands, pulling at his own hair. "God I wish I had some alcohol." He grumbled.

 "With all due respect, I don't think that's a good idea, sir." 

Tord jumped, eyes flying to the source of the voice. Pat came back.. And he didn't even realize he came in. "Mhm, and when have I ever been the king of good ideas, soldier?" He asked, the smirk that seemed to always show when he was speaking plastered on his face. Pat walked over, leaning on the desk. "Never, but you need to start somewhere." 

His smirk became a grin, and he flipped Pat off. "I've never made a good choice in my life, and I'll be damned if I start now." Pat sighed, knowing he'd lose from the get-go. "Think you could get my alcohol that you took from out of here?" Tord asked. 

Pat could barely stop his eyes from rolling as he left, Tord could tell. 

Now alone, Tord sat to ponder what Pat said.  _Maybe it is time to start somewhere.._ He thought, his eyes drifting to the pictures. He grabbed them and put them in the drawer, deciding that he'd grab them when he left tomorrow. 

It wasn't long before Pat came back with a bottle of alcohol, and a glass. Tord almost laughed. As if he'd need a glass of any sort. He grabbed the bottle, opened it with ease, and threw his head back. Chugging it. 

He cracked an eye open to see Pat still standing there, glass in hand and an eyebrow raised. Tord stopped drinking and put the bottle down, his own eyebrow raised now. "You're dismissed." At that, Pat sighed. "Don't get  _too_ drunk, sir." He said as he left, shutting the door with a _click_. 

Tord picked the bottle back up and tossed his head back.  _Heh. Tom would be proud_. 


	2. Hello Old Friend

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tord ignores a hangover and travels to Edd's apartment. Only to remember he has a hangover.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> ahhhhahahahaaaaa i appreciate the people who like this !! it gives me motivation to write, honestly  
> rip tord

Tord left that morning. 

He didn't care about the hangover he was sporting. He wanted to apologize, as fast as possible so that he could return to the army in time. He's not sure if he left a note for Pau and Pat. 

He pulled a paper out of his pocket stared, sighing. "Am I really going to do this..?" He asked himself. He reread the address over and over, trying to wrap his head around everything. His... Throbbing head. 

 "Well, can't back out now." He murmured to no one in particular. He read the address one more time before easing it into his pocket. Tord took a deep breath, trying to calm his nerves. It didn't work as well as he'd hoped. 

He pulled his hood on, keeping his head down as he walked. No one would want to see his scarred face, and  _he_  didn't want someone to recognize him. It'd be pretty bad if he got arrested while trying to apologize to his old friends. 

 _Friends_? He thought as he shoved his hands in his pockets.  _I'm not even sure if I can call them old friends anymore_ _._

Tord sighed, shaking his head. It wasn't the time to think about _that_ of all things. He should be thinking of what to say. He was nearing the apartment, and he didn't have a lot of time to decide on a conversation starter. 

 _Hello old friends? No, no, no, not that. I'd never get a chance to apologize if I started off with **that**. Just a simple greeting? Hey? Hi? Maybe. Or I could let Edd start it off and I go from there. I hope Edd's home. Trying to talk to Matt or Tom would b- shit I passed the apartment_. 

He lost focus while he was thinking, and was probably two or three buildings away from where he needed to be. He took a quick look around. No one was watching him.. No one would see him turn around. That saves embarrassment for later, when he finally knocks on the door.

When Tord finally approaches the door to the apartments, he stops and stares. 

Does he want to do this? He does. However, he does  _not_  want to deal with the receptionist. It's easy to slip inside and sneak passed him without being noticed. He wasn't paying any attention anyway. 

Tord stopped in front of the elevator, pulling out the piece of paper with the address on it. "Go up a floor... Okay," he breathed. "Just a quick 'I'm sorry' and go." 

 Surprisingly, the second he pressed the 'up' button, the elevator doors slid open. "Thank God none of them are actually on the elevator." He mumbled, stepping on. He pressed '2' and shoved his hand back in his pocket, his entire body shaking from anxiety. This was probably more anxiety-inducing than having a gun pointed at his head. At least he could control that situation..

All too soon the doors opened and he was stepping out. He inhaled, exhaled, and walked. 

Tord stopped in front of a door, not too far from the elevator at all. He raised his fist to knock and.. 

Paused. 

He stared at the wooden door, sweating and shaking. Tord wasn't sure if he could do this anymore. He'd gotten so far, he was  _right there_ , but then he started thinking. 

Their house. 

Their neighbor's house. 

 _Jon_. 

Tord flinched involuntarily at the thought of the innocent life he took. He backed away from the door, breathing heavily. He knew the signs of a panic attack, and thank God this wasn't one. It was just the fear he felt trying to take over. He gulped, shaking his head.  _Just knock_. He thought, stalking back up to the door. He raised his shaking hand once more and knocked. 

"Coming!" Shouted a familiar voice. Even though the door muffled the speaker's voice, Tord would recognize that British accent anywhere.

 _Oh. So he's in there._ Tord let his hand drop to his side as the footsteps on the other side of the door came closer. The fear was worse than ever, but he managed t _._ o put up an act. An act of pure confidence.  _A trait I don't exactly have at the moment_. 

The door swung open to reveal Edd. But honestly, who else would he be expecting? Tord watched Edd's face go on a journey of emotions. Surprise.. Fear.. Confusion.. Rage. "Hello old friend."  _Fuck. Maybe skipping painkillers was a bad idea_. 

Tord thinks he deserved that punch. 

 "What the  _fuck_ are you doing here, Tord!?" 

 Yep, definitely deserved that punch. 

__

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> its sadly still so short ::'^)  
> really, it kinda seems shorter than the last one,,,  
> the next chapter will be longer than both of these chapters tho  
> anyway, next chapter you get to see Pau and Pat  
> get ready, youre either gonna be mad or sad  
> or both ::^)


	3. Apologies and Equally Terrible Attitudes

**Summary for the Chapter:**

> Tord apologizes! And is irritating, but that's normal.

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> heyyy it took a long time for this chapter to come out but it feels r u s h e d ohmygo d   
> anyway, hope you enjoy

Tord held his cheek, groaning from the obvious swelling and hangover he completely repressed. "Okay, okay I deserved that." He said, standing up straight while still holding his cheek. 

"You're damn right you deserved that!" Edd exclaimed, clearly pissed that Tord was there. "You ruin almost everything and then come back a month later saying 'hello old friend'!" Tord flinched at that, eyes downcast. The worst part? 

Tord knew he was right. 

He chuckled dryly, removing his hand from his cheek. "Yeah, not a good conversation starter." He murmured, unsure of how to do this. He wanted to say sorry. So, so bad, but.. How? How do you apologize for something like this? 

Tord was so engrossed in his own thoughts, he almost didn't hear what Edd said. "You have five seconds to start talking, or I'm getting you arrested." He threatened, leaning against the doorframe. Angry Edd was a scary Edd, and Tord knew he wasn't joking around with that. Edd would do everything to make it happen. 

Tord pulled at his hoodie strings, unsure of what to say. 3... 4.. "I-I," He started, only to stop and rethink his words. "Edd, I'm sorry.. For everything!" He wasn't exactly finished, but Edd didn't exactly care. 

 "That's it? You came here just to say sorry!?" He scoffed, shaking his head. "I bet you're just trying to gain my trust back, right? So you can use me for whatever you need and then toss me aside like you did before, right?" Edd was so far off, but Tord knew he damn well had a right to think that. 

 "No, I just- I just needed to say it! The guilt, it's been practically tearing me apart- and I know this seems like I'm guilt-tripping you or whatever, but I'm not! Im genuinely sorry, and that's all I wanted to say." Tord inhaled a large sum of air. He didn't breathe at all. 

Edd didn't look convinced. In fact, he somehow managed to look less convinced than the first time. 

 "Come in." 

 Pat went through a series of emotions when he went into Tord's office and found him.. Not there. 

The second he saw the address on the computer that Tord conveniently left on his desk, he called Pau in. The second Pau walked in, Pat was talking. 

 "He freaking downed an entire bottle last night, and then leaves on an apology mission with no painkillers, because I know for a fact Tord isn't going to remember painkillers of all things!" Pat ranted, pacing back and forth. Pau listened to the other's complaining, only stopping him so that he'd remember to breathe. 

 Pat sighed and rested his head on Pau's shoulder, allowing the other to rub his back. "I'm just worried, y'know..? He didn't even leave a note. How are we supposed to know when he's going to get back?" He grumbled. Pau just let him finish ranting before speaking. 

 "Let's just wait. If he's not back by tomorrow morning, then we can track him down, break in, and talk some sense into him." He suggested. Pat pushed himself off of Pau's shoulder to look into his eyes. "How's that sound?" Pau added. Pat sighed, holding Pau's hands in his. 

 "Alright. I can work with that." 

Pau smiled, squeezing his hands. "I know you're stressed, because Tord doesn't ever take care of himself, but there are other things we need to be stressed about. Like leading an army full of disobedient assholes in our leader's absence." It was a poor attempt at humor, but it made Pat laugh anyway. 

Pat could feel just a little bit of weight lift off of his shoulders just from Pau alone. 

"Edd Gold what the fuck is he doing here." Tom asked.

Tord didn't look up, didn't even flinch. He just sighed and toyed with his robotic arm. From the corner of his eye, he saw Edd gesture to him, and he finally looked up to see Tom and Matt. And they both looked.. Different levels of pissed, with Matt surprisingly being higher.

Tom crossed his arms, his glare deepening. "Well? We're waiting." Tord shifted his gaze over to Matt, who wasn't even looking in his general direction.

 "I, uh.. Came to apologize." Tord mumbled, suddenly finding the floor very interesting. He could hear Tom's scoff, Matt's huff of disapproval. "Edd, you actually believed him?" Tom sneered. Tord decided to answer for him. 

 "No. In- in fact, he didn't believe anything I told him. But that's okay," Tord exclaimed, standing up. "You don't have to! I only came to apologize, and I did that. So, I can, uh, go- and be out of your hair forever." He stammered, trying to move to the door. 

Too bad Edd stopped him. 

 "Nope, not good enough. Sit down, Tord. Actually," He began, looking at Tom and Matt. "I don't know why you two are still standing. Sit down." Without a word, the two sat down. They could see Edd wasn't in the mood for Tom to be a dick. 

Tord gulped, his left leg bouncing rapidly in his fear. "So, Tord. You want forgiveness, right?" Edd started. Said person looked up, blinking wide eyes. "I mean, yeah, I guess? B-but, I don't exac-," Edd didn't let Tord finish and began to talk again. "I have an idea. You stay with us, and you can try to prove to us you're sorry." 

 Tord could practically hear Jeopardy playing on repeat in his head as he decided on his answer. But the army. I can't just leave it... He thought, chewing on his top lip. He sighed, finally thinking of an answer. It wasn't too hard to decide on anyway. 

"Alright.." He made the mistake once, he won't do it again.

Stuck in his own thoughts, Tord didn't hear Matt begin speaking. "I don't get the point in letting him stay here again." Before Edd could even open his mouth, Tom spoke. "You miss him, don't you?" He asked. Edd immediately covered Tom's mouth. "You're so lucky he's spacing out." He hissed, looking over at Tord, who still hadn't moved. Edd reluctantly removed his hand, crossing his arms. "And to answer your question, of course. But that's not why I'm letting him stay here." Tom raised an eyebrow, clearly waiting for Edd to finish. 

 "Tord's not exactly trustworthy... But I'm curious. I want to know if he's actually sorry. But if he tries anything else I've got 911 on speed dial." Edd explained, holding up his phone. Tom clicked his tongue, leaning back on the couch. "That's kinda messed up." 

 "What's messed up?" 

 At the sound of Tord's voice, everyone turned to look at him. Tord couldn't tell if it was just because he spoke without being spoken to, or a territorial action, but he didn't stop staring. In fact, he narrowed his eyes at the other three. Surprisingly, it was Edd who backed down first. 

"You'd know if you had been listening." He answered, looking away and glaring at nothing. Tord sighed, shaking his head. He didn't have the energy to care about Edd's antics. "Okay," he started, beginning to nervously tap on his knee. "I know none of you would be even remotely okay with me staying in a room alone, so.. Who am I gonna stay with?" 

Edd thought about his answer, weighing his options, and the possible outcomes depending on who he was roomed with. Finally, he said, "Tom." 

 Immediately, Tord started asking questions, as well as Tom. "What? Why?" "He's going to kill me, you wouldn't even have to worry about betrayal, I'll be dead!" "He's so fucking annoying, why are you trying to torture me like this?" "Was your plan this entire time me dying?" Edd rolled his eyes, and Matt, who had been uncharacteristically silent, was attempting to stifle his laughter. He was failing. "Will both of you let me talk?!" Edd shouted, causing the two to shut up on instinct. He sighed in relief, thankful for the chance to talk.  

 "No, I'm not trying to torture you, and no my plan isn't to kill you. I'm not a psychopath, jeez." Tord and Tom both looked away sheepishly as they listened to Edd speak. "You're rooming together because I trust Tom wouldn't hesitate to... Uh... Subdue?? I guess that's good enough. Anyway, Tom won't hesitate to punch you if you do anything suspicious." 

Tord swallowed thickly, nervous and genuinely afraid. If Tom tried to punch him or whatever, he couldn't fight back. Because then it'd take longer for them to trust him. Tord realized he'd have to actually listen to Tom, and boy did that frustrate him. 

Edd clapped his hands together, looking way more relaxed. "Now that this.. Meeting.. Thing. Is over, all of you can get out so I can wallow in my self-pity over this!" 

 Tord looked concerned, but decided not to question it too much since he does basically the same thing. He watches Matt and Tom stand up and decides that maybe he has to stand up as well, so he does. Matt's gone by the time Tom and Tord start walking towards the door.

They were silent the whole way to Tom's apartment room. The second they shut the door, Tom was walking off. Most likely to his own room. 

 "Wait, what am I supposed to do?" Tord asked, looking around. It was a bit messy, but that was.. Comforting, in a way. "Just... Sit on the couch for now." He huffed, continuing his walk away from Tord. 

He rocked back and forth on the balls of his feet, looking at the spot where Tom stood. "...Oookay." He sighed, walking over to the couch and sitting down. While he waited for Tom, he tapped his knee repeatedly. 

 "You're fidgety." 

 At the sound of Tom's voice, the movement stopped. "What?" Tord turned to face Tom, confusion written on his face. Tom crossed his arms, looking angry and grumpy. As usual. "You're fidgety. As in, you move a lot. That's not a normal thing for you." 

 Tord rolled his eyes at Tom's comment. "I came here to apologize and leave, not prove my honesty." He huffed, not meeting Tom's... Black holes for eyes. "So why'd ya' say yes then?" Tom carried on asking questions, and Tord was getting tired of it. Or rather, getting tired of trying give away everything while simultaneously giving away nothing. "I was under pressure, excuse me if making intelligent decisions that would benefit all of us was a little difficult to do!" He exclaimed, saying nothing more. 

It was silent for a long time, the only sound being Tord's angry breathing. "Y'know," Tom began, narrowing his eyes. "I don't think you're in any position to be yelling at me." He warned. Tord didn' answer. He was pissed off and Tom's presence was irritating him. 

"You don't have to be so hostile, asshole." At those words, Tord glanced over. He wasn't sure what Tom meant by that, and he was about to ask, but Tom was already standing up. "I'm gonna be in my room. Don't touch my shit. Just... Go to sleep, or something." Tom grumbled, chugging whatever alcoholic beverage he had in that flask as he left. 

The second the door closed, Tord was leaning back on the couch and screaming into the arm of the chair.  _This was a **horrible**  idea_. He thought. "I'm so stupid!" He huffed, chastising himself. He held his head in his hands, sighing. "Pat's gonna kill me. He's going to somehow manage to put me on probation from being the Red Leader. Pau and Pat are gonna lock me up in the fucking prison and take over for like 84 whole years." 

Just as he finished complaining to the silence, there was a knock at the door. Deciding it might've been Edd or even Matt, he got up to open the door. 

However, upon opening the door, he found it was neither of them. 

 "Pau. Pat. How the  _actual fuck_ did you find me?" 

    

**Notes for the Chapter:**

> for anyone who wants to like, send asks and stuff, my tumblr is alizarinisnotgreat

**Author's Note:**

> i spent 8 whole hours on this shit and its shorter than hanzo shimada  
> heyyy maybe future chapters will be longer?? hopefully,,,,  
> anyway, yesyes i hope you enjoyed reading and who knows? maybe ill add more to chapter one  
> so schools starting 'n all that goodgood so updating WILL BE slow  
> or well  
> slower than sitting down for 8 hours and producing this piece of shit


End file.
